What Would You Do? Very Serious Question.?

Question by ?? Br0wnEyez ??: What would you do? Very serious question.?
I have an older brother who is going to be 22 this September. He’s fully capable of taking care of himself, but pretty much refuses to. He lives with my mother, doesn’t go to school (he was going to college and said he was going to go back but finds every excuse in the book on why he can’t enroll again or he’ll go next semester…ect.) or work, doesn’t do any cleaning what-so-ever in the house, rarely cleans up after himself even…. except for the occasional dish here and there. There’s always a reason ( to him anyways) why he can’t get a job, why he didn’t take out the garbage, why he cant make a few phone calls to get things going with school (or anything else), ect. ect. ect. …

He has an obsession with the computer. That’s all he does all day, is sit on the computer, eat, sleep… then repeat. He never wants to go out, we are always asking him to come out with us and he just says no, he doesn’t like going shopping or he doesn’t feel like it ect.

He doesnt do any drugs or drink alcohol.

My mom will spend hundreds of dollars a month on food and he’s the only one who really eats it, and he eats it all. He refuses to file up for FoodStamps or get any kind of help. He’s even said that he thinks that he feels that my mother should have to pay his way until he finishes school (keep in mind, he’s not attending anymore) and gets a job.

My mom just cant take it anymore. She won’t kick him out of the house though… she just wont kick her own son out on the streets and i can’t say that i blame her… i don’t know if i could even do that. She’s soooo stressed out, and its not like what my brother is doing (or lack there of) is just affecting him… its affecting everyone around him. It stresses my mom out, and me seeing how it affects my mom bothers me very much. She’s constantly talking about how she cant deal with it anymore.What would you do?

What options are available to us?

She’s asked nicely for him to do things around the house… she’s tried EVERYTHING i can think of but kicking him out. We just dont know what to do.
My brother is a very smart person and is hearing impared… though he is fully capable of living a “normal” life (who’s to say what’s normal?). Just thought that i’d add that in there.
We’ve done that. My mom just wont kick him out. My brother wouldn’t ever be able to survive out in the ‘homeless’ world.. .and that would be more stress on my mother’s shoulders wondering how her son is doing. She’s even said herself she couldnt live with herself is she did that and something happened to him. Kicking him out is not an option…. but maybe getting him help is. Do you think there may be grounds to Baker Act him? Its an extreme move, but it may be what he needs to show him that how he’s acting is not normal.
WaitingOn#3… I don’t disagree with you. But when my mother comes to me asking what should she do, and when she’s and when she stressed out…. what do i do? I try to help her. That’s why I’m on here asking what options are available to us and/or my brother.

He uses his hearing imparement as a crutch. Whenever we approach him with ANY type of confronting he’s always in an uproar talking about how everyone gangs up on him and basically always playing the victim card… trying to get out of anything.

Best answer:

Answer by erifonz
My brother is the EXACT same way.
I dont know what to say except that let me know if you figure something out.
and good luck

Answer by silly_duck96
Then she should tell him he has one month to get a job or he is out. If your mother won’t stand up for herself then there isn’t much you can do. You, your mom, and brother can all sit down together and talk about this. You both approach him and tell him how its going to be from now on. Tell him what he has to do.
Your mom needs back up.


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