How to Get My Mom to Relax?

Question by Spencer: How to get my mom to relax?
I’m sixteen and live with my mom. We’re close, she’s been my rock. I battled an eating disorder, depression, cutting and harassment for being gay. She and my brothers were there through it all while my dad (they’re divorced)ignored it. It caused me to have to go away to get help and I’m now on meds and I’m still in therapy. While I’m not “cured”, I feel better about myself. I no longer want to die or starve myself. My mom still acts like I’m going to break. I love her and I understand but it’s been 5 months. Even my therapist says I’m doing better. She freaks out when I leave or when I just want to do something alone. I get moms worry but it’s hard to recover when she’s still treating me like I’m fragile. When I was as bad as I was before I was so dependent on her and now I’m not. I’ll always need her, she’s my mom. But she’s not like this with my brothers (I have a twin and one’s just a year older). I try to talk to her but it doesn’t work. I keep blowing up at her which I know is wrong, it’s just frustrating. What should I do?
I’m sorry I’m overdramatic because I struggled with depression and I’m getting help? I think I’m doing some good. I’m grateful for my mother and I love her so much, but I need my space. The world doesn’t revolve around me and I get it affects her but I agree with the first poster that maybe we should attend counseling together. I really hope your child never goes through what I did because you’d obviously be very negative. Do some research on depression and anxiety.

Best answer:

Answer by Zamboni
You are lucky to have such a Mom who has stood by you and supported you. I know you know that.

However, what to do about this frantic worrying is a real dilemma.

You have a therapist – why don’t you have joint sessions with you and your Mom? She obviously could use the reassurance and you can still continue with your separate sessions. You could either use the current therapist or get a new one just for the both of you.

The benefit of this approach should be obvious – it gives her some input, it allows her to speak explicitly about what concerns her, and it will give her some well-deserved peace of mind, as well as getting off your case a bit.

What do you think? I think we need to cut Mom a break here.

Good luck to you both!

Answer by Nikki S
Wow, you have issues. No wonder she is always on edge, you sound very selfish…more like a drama queen who thinks the world and every one else’s life revolves around you and your feelings. Have you considered that other people have a life too and they might be tired of dealing with you all the time? Grow up…get a hobby and stop being attention seeking….it will calm everyone down and people will want to be around you more….i know it sounds mean…but really, how long do you intend on keeping all of these behaviors up for? At some point, u gotta move out and get a real life…


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