How Do I Get Over an Embarrassing Speech?

Question by Rose: How do I get over an embarrassing speech?
I’m doing a subject where the whole idea is to gain confidence in speaking. One of the activities is to be picked randomly and speak for 1 minute on a chosen topic that another person picks. I got chosen to speak and felt so nervous that I don’t think I made sense. After it all, I was embarrassed at the end. 🙁 I have low self esteem and this made me feel over critical and embarrassed of myself. How do I stop feeling this way? In addition, everyone seemed to have done way better than me. I feel like a nervous wreck.

Best answer:

Answer by ctsmrvn
There are a couple of life’s secrets at play here, so let me share them with you. First, you probably did a lot better than you think. People tend to judge themselves a lot more harshly than they are judged by others. (That’s part of the psychology behind “eating disorders.” Some people continually see themselves as “fat,” even when everyone else views them as “starving to death.”) Most of the others in the class probably thought you did just fine. A second “truth” is that the other people in the class were busy worrying about when their own turn would come, and probably paid no attention to you. Whatever little goofs you may have made are very likely to have gone unnoticed. Third, the other students in the class were doubtless just as embarrassed and uncomfortable as you were, so they were too busy “beating themselves up” over their own mistakes to worry about any little ones you made. And, finally, the whole event will quickly blow over. Time will heal it, and the sooner you can focus on something new and positive, the sooner that will happen. Treat yourself to a favorite meal, hang out with your best friends, go to a silly movie, or participate in some other activity which you really enjoy. Focus on the future rather than the past, and you will be feeling fine in no time.

Catherine Aharon-LMFT (eatingdisorders-nyc.com)
NYC Psychotherapist Catherine Aharon describes her approach for treating Eating Disorders.